Cape Gazette
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Retirement 101

It takes two to tango

By Lisa Graff | Jul 08, 2014

A passerby strolling down Baltimore Avenue in downtown Rehoboth might notice the artwork in the window of Anita Peghini-Raber’s gallery and wander in to take a better look. But if you wandered into her gallery a few Saturdays ago, you might have stayed until 2 a.m. to tango! Anita writes, “About 28 dancers, also a tanguero couple from Philadelphia, some youth from Istanbul working the summer in RB, and many guests visiting the art and observing for the first time watched Milonga, a social dance, and also the  Argentine Tango, created in the moment by the couple.”

“I took up dancing at the age of 72, when I noticed that I really wanted to leave this beautiful life with a swing in my hips and a spring in my cadence. You only grow old once you stop learning new things,” writes Marilyn Himelick. “This is the first group of people that makes me feel that I fit in; we all share a curiosity for learning new things regardless of age, profession, gender or sexual orientation.”

Tango DE Arte taught by Alyssa Findlay will have another class Saturday, July 19, from 8:15 to 9 p.m. ($10 fee) followed by a social dance from 9 p.m. to 1 a.m. Check out TangoLewes.com to learn more about how you can put a swing in your hips. Anita promises, “We all love to move, to explore and to dance with each other regardless of gender. We learn to lead and follow, which makes us more tolerant and forgiving to our challenging steps.”

Speaking of lead and follow - happy 58th wedding anniversary to Bob and Betty Hatfield, who were married in Forestville, Md., June 30, 1956. “There have been good days and bad days,” says Bob. “The point is, you learn to work things out.”

Retirement is a tango of sorts - perhaps a metaphor for all relationships. All of a sudden, two people show up at the toaster at the same time. Two people who want to step in different directions. My friend Nancy asked me for some advice as she is retiring this summer and is going to be home now for the first time with her husband every day. I can only say there will be a period of adjustment. Now Ray and I are both involved in activities which take us out of the house on different days. Truthfully there was a time when I asked him to leave the house just so I could be alone. I was afraid he would get his feelings hurt, but he saw it as a new opportunity to attend a wine tasting. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, or as my good friend Tom likes to say, how can I miss you if you never go away?

Rayquest and I traveled to New Mexico last month, visiting Albuquerque, Santa Fe and Taos for the first time, and we enjoyed being together. We sampled red and green chilies and mole sauce while my Aunt Laurie tangoed across the wooden floor with Princess Gracie and her rope toy. I am so happy to be home in Delaware even during the busiest traffic weekend of the year. As Bob says, there are good days and bad! Happy July Fourth, everyone!  Enjoy your independence whenever you can!

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