The blog I feared I would have to write
“Write your problems down in detail, take them to a higher place,” Bloody Well Right, Supertramp
So tonight as I get home from a long, exhausting day I find myself about to write the blog I feared I would have to write, but somehow knew someday I would have to write.
The thing with my blog, as of now, is that I am not promoting it. Don’t get me wrong, it is located on two sites, one being a newspaper’s website, so I am getting it out there. By promoting, I mean I am not yet showcasing it on social media, or telling the world. I want people to find it on their own, aside from some I have told from the beginning and are religious readers. I am still figuring it all out, and until my clear plan is functioning on all cylinders, I am just letting those find it one way or another without my help.
Because I am not necessarily directing people to my site, readers are finding it at different times. Not knowing how much people have read, I feel I may need to again reinforce my process and how I plan to proceed when creating entries.
It seems that recently a blog post upset an individual. This person was not the subject of any particular entry, but may have felt this way. For this I am sorry, but not for my words. A writer must stand by the words they use, for better or worse. The life of a writer is a hard one as we know the power of the written word. I personally get lost in the written word and strive to write words that make someone feel something. The goal of a writer is to affect the reader. But because I know what words can lead to, I must clarify just how I work.
I strive to be honest, first and foremost. I also will not name names and will provide as little detail as possible so no one really knows of who I may be speaking. I will never tell anyone who I am referencing, no one needs to know.
The reason, this blog is about me and my world, it is not about anyone else. I don’t think it is right to bring someone else in when they didn’t choose to have a blog. I will sometimes use vague terms such as they or not refer to the correct sex to keep others from being recognized. I believe this is the wise thing to do. I also will check with those I am able before being discussed. I am not saying I will tell them what I am writing, but I ask permission for a person to be written about. Of course people I don’t know I don’t ask because how could I? I don’t plan to ever say anything incredibly harsh. It has pained me to have to contact a few people for permission, but I did.
But permission aside, I must stand behind my work. I took it upon myself to change some things recently to reflect more closely who I was referring, but then I talked to a writer friend who changed my mind. He reminded me that by changing anything, it changes the integrity of what I wrote. So I will be changing it back. It is already out there, I must stand by it whatever the cost.
This post may be contradictory of that, but in this case it was needed. I am taking the high road, much like I think Laura Bush would do. She is integrity, she is class, she is my inspiration.
I try to be positive every day, and even entries that are negative I try to end on a positive note. This won’t always happen, sometimes even I can’t be all sunshine and rainbows. But I still hope to never say anything too harsh. That doesn’t serve a purpose for anything, so why even start. Again, I am sure I will fail sometimes at this but we all make mistakes. I will always accept fault. Laura Bush has taught me that.
But since I am being honest, I will say that too much should not be read into all my blogs. This goal of five new entries a week I have found to be quite difficult sometimes. The words aren’t always there, nor do I expect a Laura Bush moment daily. Because of that, sometimes I must draw on friends’ experiences and make them my own. It is always my beliefs and feelings, but sometimes they provide the set up.
Also, the day reference may not always match up since I will write more than one some days and keep for those writer’s block days. I don’t always remember to change such references as last night. Anyone that has been a loyal reader knows I struggle with proofing what I write, so I will forget. I have trouble reading my own work once I finish. I am working on it. I am learning that this may make things come off differently than I intend and that I hope to prevent.
All this said, I can’t feel bad if someone reads something and assumes it is about them. If I touch a nerve or someone feels guilty, that is on them. If you don’t ask me, don’t assume. Nine times out of 10, someone who thinks I am speaking of them is wrong. But when they are right, I will admit it. I will ask readers to first read everything, then contact me. I am not perfect, but I am honest.
In the end, this blog is personal self-discovery on a public scale. We all see things differently, and this is my view and mine alone. I will stumble, I will pick the wrong words, but I will continue to find my way and live life how I think Laura Bush would. I will keep getting knocked down, but I will keep getting up by asking, what would Laura Bush do?
Author’s Note: When I got in my car today after work, this was the song that was beginning on the radio. I sat listening to the words, processing the day. I have always been a Supertramp fan, but today was the first time that they really, truly spoke to me. Bloody well right they deserve a shout out.